Horsham-based female personal trainer, Becky, guides clients through one-to-one sessions at an independent gym. Her speciality? Increasing your confidence in your ability whilst helping you to strength train. Here’s how she does it…

We’ve all got a type, haven’t we? I’m talking about clients, rather than romantic partners, but the same rule probably applies to both. There are those we will absolutely never get along with, as our personalities and approaches just don’t align. And there are others who are our total dream match. It’s meant to be, we get along brilliantly, and we bring out the best in each other.

In terms of personal training clients, my type is anxious women who think that exercise isn’t for them. And I’m proud to say that, once they’re with me, they don’t stay anxious and unconfident. Sometimes, that changes in as little as an hour. The problem isn’t fully solved in that time, I’m not a complete magician. But they absolutely can and do take huge steps, even in their first session with me.

And this is how I do it…

Meeting my clients where they’re at
This one has always seemed completely obvious to me. Rather than expect a client to be at my level, or anyone else’s, I learn where they are, and stand beside them. Then I coax them forward, at a pace that’s slightly more intense than they think that they can manage.

Leaving your own expectations at the door is one of the best ways to improve the efficacy of your coaching. Because who are you to decide on behalf of another adult what they should want or need? Help them to get from where they are to where they want to be, and don’t expect them to do any more legwork than they’ve already done. Because the odds are that they’ve reached out and found you, and that’s enough, it’s your job to guide from there.

Nudging my clients to the edge of their comfort zone
I’ve touched on this already, but we can take it further. All of us stay where we’re comfortable, I do it too. It’s warm and fuzzy and safe and easy. And it’s not where progress is made. It serves a purpose, and when we want to achieve more, we have to push ourselves beyond that space. Again, it’s my job to do that for a client.

I’m in a better position to see what they can accomplish, so encouraging them to reach a little further is part of my job. There’s a delicate balance – it’s about it being an achievable nudge, rather than expecting a giant leap every time. All it takes is one step beyond the one they think that they can take, and a round of applause, and their confidence will blossom. I love getting to be part of that.

Showing my clients what they’re capable of
And when you achieve the first two things, the third follows. As the trust my clients have in me increases, I allow my bolshier side to come out. When they’ve worked with me for a little while, I can start pushing a bit harder – they’ve had some experience with me, and they know that rather than throw them under the bus, I’m going to bundle them onto it so that they can enjoy the ride.

What’s important about this one is stepping back and taking my hands off the wheel. When someone realises that the accomplishment truly is theirs, that they’ve done it with their body, rather than me supporting them, then they really start to believe in themselves. And the grin on my face grows even broader.

The result for my clients…
Is that they leave their sessions smiling and relaxed. It’s my intention from the outset, and it’s completely reverse engineered. The journey to that moment starts before they even arrive for their first session – I let them know that I know how it feels.

There’s a story about a person who falls down a hole in the street. Various personalities walk past, noticing that they’re stuck, and offering items to supposedly help such as a prayer or some medication. But those aren’t what the person needs. A friend then appears, and leaps down into the hole to join them.

“What did you do that for?!” the stuck person asks. “Now we’re both stuck down here.”

“Ah,” says their friend, “I’ve been in this hole before, and I know the way out.”

Want to work with me to steadily gain confidence in your ability? Get in touch to find out more.

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